Basic Courtesy and Guidelines for Dance Partnering

Basic Courtesy and Guidelines for Dance Partnering

By Beata Howe

Dance is an art. Thus --Each of YOU who dance ARE artists.

Art is communication and the quality of communication. In dancing there is communication in a few ways –

1. Physical communication between the partners;

2. Communication between the dancing individuals, the  partnership and the music; and

 3. Sometimes between the dancers and any observers (audience).

For most people it is very stressful to have their communication stopped, invalidated, rejected, altered, evaluated or neglected.

Thus working on dancing, especially toward a performance, can be a very sensitive and stressful relationship.

  1. When there is a problem with a move, the real source of the problem is usually a couple of beats, a couple of connection or a couple of positions before the noticeable difficulty. Don’t look to solve at the symptom of the problem but before it. If the problem doesn’t resolve easily – that isn’t the problem it’s something else!
  2. Sandwich criticisms or evaluations between compliments or always find something that is “going right” to say with the something that is “going not so right”.
  3. Often one partner or the other will remember the choreography faster than their partner will. Practice enough for the comfort and certainty of both partners.
  4. As the follower learns the choreography she may put herself through the routine (anticipate) actions and not connect well – this phenomena of not following will pass as her certainty and the leader’s certainty and execution of leads raises to a point where each trusts their own and their partners’ knowledge of the routine. Don’t get to frustrated with the time this takes – it makes it seem longer if pushed too hard or too fast.
  5. When something isn’t working quite right do the following: 1. Each partner should ask himself or herself: “What can I do to make it go better?” “ What can I do to make it more precise?” “… easier?” “ … for my partner?”. 2. And/or get the partnership looking for a solution with the question: “I’m not sure what’s going wrong but this isn’t comfortable for me – any ideas as to what WE can do?”
  6. If you have to ask for your partner to change something they are doing the following is a kind way to get both of you working together towards a solution – “I’m not really comfortable with how this is going it might HELP me if you would try …”.
  7. It often helps to open a conversation about some difficulty with a move, syncopation, etc. with a question that shows your interest in your partner’s opinion, comfort, and awareness. “Are you noticing/feeling/comfortable with …?”, “ does this feel correct to you?”, “What was it that the coach told us about ….?
  8. Get coaching or another outside point of view when problems don’t resolve easily.

Good Luck and Happy Dancing!!!! Yeeaaahhhh!!!